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Volume 8: Issue 3 | Date: February 25, 2019

COMMERCIAL BROKER NEWSLETTER

You are receiving this letter because you either wrote to us or you are a commercial real estate broker client of either Blackburne & Sons or C-Loans, Inc. Today we’ll discuss a scenario where several thousand, high-net-worth, U.S. real estate investors succumb to pneumonia, sadly creating some attractive commercial real estate opportunities.  We also have lots of cute, clean jokes, some funny pics, and a cute video of the smallest pony you have ever seen.

Joke Du Jour

When our second child was on the way, my wife and I attended a pre-birth class aimed at couples who had already had at least one child. The instructor raised the issue of breaking the news to the older child. It went like this: "Some parents," she said, "tell the older child, 'We love you so much we decided to bring another child into this family.' But think about that. Ladies, what if your husband came home one day and said, 'Honey, I love you so much I decided to bring home another wife.'"  One of the women spoke up immediately. "Does she cook???”

911 Joke

Dispatcher: "Nine-one-one. What is your emergency?"

Caller: "I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner."

Dispatcher: "Do you have an address?" 

Caller: "No, I have on a blouse and slacks. Why?”

Private Money Commercial Permanent Loans

From $100K to $1.5M Nationwide

Click HERE to Apply Now!

Do you need a commercial lender who will actually lend up to 75% LTV? Blackburne & Sons has decided to compete against banks by offering a higher LTV.

Do you need a lender who will also look at the borrower's global income - income from salaries, other investments, etc.? Do you need a lender who will allow the seller to carry back a second mortgage? Does your client have a balloon payment coming due on his commercial property? Has your bank offered him a discounted pay-off? Does your borrower have less-than-stellar credit? Is your client's company losing money? Is your borrower a foreign national? Do you need a non-recourse loan? Do you need a commercial loan with no prepayment penalty?

Is your client's commercial property partially vacant? Do all of your commercial leases run out in the next 18 months? Do you need a lender who will allow a negative cash flow? Do you need a loan against a portfolio of rental houses?

And don't forget, we will quickly and happily issue you a written Loan Approval Letter - at no charge - that you can use as a fallback and to lure cheaper lenders. After all, everyone wants to lend to you if you already have a commitment. Here is our latest rate sheet.

Call For Money Joke

You have $400 and your daughter calls and needs $250. Later on you son calls and needs $100. What do you have left? Four-hundred dollars and two missed phone calls!

Insurance Joke (I sent this funny to my insurance agent.)

A man phoned to find out whether he could get insurance if the nearby volcano erupted…  They assured him he would be covered.

Business Purpose Rental Home Loans in Most States

Click HERE to Apply Now!

Please pay special attention to the following: Unlike other hard money brokers, Blackburne & Sons Realty Capital Corporation makes home loans with a 15-year term (30-year amortization), and there is NO prepayment penalty. Our competitors make just three-year or five-year bridge loans. Our loans are clearly better because you may want to hold the property. These loans are sometimes known as buy-to-rent loans.

Historically, Blackburne & Sons was mostly a commercial lender. This has now changed. We are aggressively aggressively seeking non-owner occupied home loans. We have already closed loans in the following states, and our attorney can quickly research your state to verify that we can lend there. Unfortunately, in a handful of states, an NMLS license is not enough.

Click HERE to submit a deal to George

Extra Arm Joke

"A company is working on a new selfie stick shaped like a human arm so users won't look like they're alone in pictures. Instead you'll just look like a completely normal person who's carrying around a severed human arm.” — Seth Meyers 

How to Earn Huge Referral Fees

Please click here after viewing the video.

Spelling Joke

Little Johnny's teacher was preparing the students for the upcoming Spelling Bee when she asked Johnny to "Spell ‘straight.'"

Little Johnny: "S-T-R-A-I-G-H-T."

Teacher: “Correct. What does it mean?"

Little Johnny: "Without ginger ale.”

Submit Your “A” Quality Commercial Loans Using C-Loans

You old veterans know that commercial lenders are incredibly fickle. One moment a bank loves self storage loans, and the next moment - usually after taking a loss - it wouldn't touch a self storage facility loan with a ten-foot pole. C-Loans.com is a commercial mortgage portal that was designed with commercial lender fickleness in mind.

You fill out one mini-app, and then you can submit your commercial loan application to bank after bank, six at a time, until you find a bank hungry to make a commercial loan today. 

Borrowers and commercial brokers have closed over 1,000 commercial real estate loans totaling over $1 billion, so C-Loans clearly works. And C-Loans.com is FREE!

Apply for a loan now!

Literature Joke

Q: What do you call it when you mix alcohol and American Literature?

A: Tequila Mockingbird.

Hot-To-Trot To Make Fix and Flip Loans

Blackburne & Sons is making a huge push into fix and flip lending. Of course we will still make our private money permanent loans on commercial properties nationwide; but we are now also making fix and flip loans across the country.

Please click here to submit a fix and flip loan or a hard money commercial loan or call me, George Blackburne IV, at (916) 338-3232.

Star Wars Joke

I was watching Star Wars with my daughter. She asked why Luke was climbing inside a Tauntaun. I said to keep warm. She asked, "How warm is it inside?” I said, "Lukewarm.”

Yield Sign Joke

A hesitant driver, waiting for a traffic jam to clear, came to a complete stop on the freeway ramp. Traffic thinned, but the driver still waited. Finally, a furious voice from the vehicle behind him cried, “The sign says to yield, not give up!”

Only Blackburne & Sons Can Do This

Blackburne & Sons has some truly unique and super cool programs:

• We'll give you a bridge loan on your commercial property for only one point! There is no prepayment penalty.
• We allow sellers to carry back a second mortgage behind our first mortgage.
• We will actually lend up to a 75% loan-to-value ration. Banks claim they will lend up to 75% LTV, but in real life they will only go 68% LTV.
• We offer private money (loose-goosey underwriting) commercial loans with 30-year payments and a 15-year term. Our competitors offer 2 to 3-year bridge loans. We offer 15-year permanent loans with no prepayment penalty. Never again will you have a balloon payment come due during a recession.
• We buy commercial first mortgages (usually at a discount).
• Instead of discounting your wonderful commercial first mortgage, consider pledging it as collateral for a smaller loan. This is called a hypothecation. We make loans secured by mortgage notes owned by the borrower.

Love Joke

Woman: "Do you love me?"

Man: "Yes, dear." 

Woman: "Would you die for me?"

Man: “No, mine is an undying love."

Elephant Joke

Jake is 5 and learning to read. He points at a picture in a zoo book and says, "Look Mama! It's a frickin' elephant!” The mom reacts and takes a deep breath, "What did you call it?” "It's a frickin' elephant, Mama. It says so on the picture." The mom grabs the book and takes a look. Her son was right. The book read, "African Elephant.”

Diamond Ring Joke

A businessman boarded a plane to find, sitting next to him, an elegant woman wearing the largest, most stunning diamond ring he had ever seen. He asked her about it. "This is the Bexfield diamond," she said. "It is beautiful, but there is a terrible curse that goes with it.” "What's the curse?" the man asked. "Mr. Bexfield.”

Two Ways To Earn Referral Fees for Commercial Loans

We Once Paid $21,250

This is an absolute no-brainer. You simply put a link to C-Loans.com on your real estate website. We once paid a $21,250 referral fee to a guy who was asleep when the lead came in! Here are the details.

You can also refer commercial loans by hand. Simply insert your referrals here.

Crying Joke

Little Johnny ran into the room sobbing as through his heart would break. "Whats the problem, Johnny?" asked his mother. 

"Oh, Daddy was hanging a picture, and he dropped it on his toe," replied Johnny. "Why, that's nothing to cry about. You should be laughing at that," said his mother. "I did," Johnny replied.

On a Personal Note

This past weekend, my partner and I went on our first hike of the season. We are lucky enough to live close to the river and a wildlife preserve, so within 10 minutes from leaving our house we can be walking through an oak forest.  

 The foothills of the Sacramento Valley truly are an underappreciated landscape. The spring grasses give the land a carpet of green, broken only by pops of white, purple and yellow wild flowers. The oak trees, bare for much of the winter, and sending out their new leaves. They reach over the path, mottling the light and casting playful shadows. The river itself is crystal clear. So clear in fact you can see trout darting from one log to another.  It won’t be long before the weather turns and the beating sun makes these hikes unbearable, so for now we are going to enjoy it as much as we can. 

Video - Smallest Pony I've Ever Seen

Short video but pretty cute.

Final Funny

The Catholic Church's air conditioning broke down, so they had to hire a man to crawl around in the ducts and figure out what was wrong. As the man peeked down through one of the vents in the sanctuary, he saw little old Mrs. Murphy, kneeling by the altar, apparently saying her rosary.

Since the man was a fundamental Baptist, he thought it'd be funny to try and mess with the old lady's mind. In his best authoritative voice, he said, "This is Jesus. Your prayers will be answered.” The little old lady didn't even blink. She just kept on saying her prayers. The man decided that maybe she didn't hear him, so he tried again. "This is Jesus, the Son of God. Your prayers will be answered."

Again, she didn't react at all. Mustering up a big breath of air, the man decided to try again. "THIS IS JESUS CHRIST, THE SON OF GOD! YOUR PRAYERS WILL BE ANSWERED!” The lady looks up and says, "QUIET DOWN! I'M TALKING TO YOUR MOTHER!”

Members of the Blackburne Family of Companies

CA DRE #829677

NMLS #103430

P: (916) 338-3232

F: (916) 338-2328

4811 Chippendale Dr, Ste. 101

Sacramento, CA 95841

CA DRE #1330173

NMLS #167100